Service dog throws self in front of bus to protect blind owner

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http://kfor.com/2015/06/09/witnesses-service-dog-throws-self-in-front-of-bus-to-protect-blind-owner/

BREWSTER, N.Y. – A service dog who went to great lengths to protect his owner is now recovering.

Figo is Audrey Stone’s service dog. Stone, who is blind, relies on the dog to get around and lead a normal life.

Figo is no stranger to crossing the street with Stone, but recently the dog’s protective instincts gained national attention.

Witnesses say a mini school bus was turning left onto the street and the driver was paying attention to oncoming traffic.

However, they say he didn’t notice that a pedestrian was just ahead.

When Figo saw the bus heading straight for Stone, he threw himself in front of the bus, according to The Journal News.

“I don’t know if [the driver] thought [Stone] was going to move faster, but it looks like the dog tried to take most of the hit for her,” said Paul Schwartz, who witnessed the accident.

Stone suffered a fractured right elbow, three broken ribs, a fractured ankle and a cut to her head, police told the Journal News.

Witnesses say Figo’s leg was cut down to the bone.

Despite his injuries, witnesses say Figo was more concerned about his owner.

“The dog took a lot of the blow,” Brewster Police Chief John Del Gardo told The Journal News. “And he did not want to leave her side. He stood right with her. He was there to save her.”

The driver of the bus was given a summons for failing to yield to a pedestrian.

Figo’s front leg is in a splint and Stone is recovering from surgery.

WATCHING DUCKS AND GEESE

by Kenneth Harper Finton IMG_2186 I am counting my blessings today, one of which is the ability to walk around a nearby lake that is also a bird preserve. The lake is called Berkeley Lake. It lies right off I70 in Denver, just before disappearing into the great Rocky Mountains.  Not only do I get needed daily exercise, but I make some ‘fine feathered friends” along the way …  not so much close friends, but acquaintances that help to brighten the day. joggermom-1 Meeting the other folk that are out to enjoy the day can be as important as the walk, as walkers abound at all times of the day, from wheelchair bound folk carrying oxygen to young mothers jogging with fat-wheeled baby carriages to take off the baby fat. When I was a child, baby carriages had thin rubber wheels and were pushed by sedate women with long summer dresses whose major purpose was to do some shopping or get the child outdoors. These days, healthy young women jog down the manicured sidewalks by the dozens, far outpacing my plodding and deliberate steps.IMG_2062

Regular hikers at our lake include Harry, a white-bearded, fit man who has lived in the neighborhood since childhood and walks around the lake four or five times every day.  He knows all about the birds, the eagles that nest there and the history of the lake since the early 1920s.

One of m170px-1_Wild_Turkeyy precious possessions that were handed down from my parents was my father’s copy of Audubon’s Birds of America. My mother bought the great volume of paintings for my father for Christmas in 1942, three months after I was born. I often wondered how she afforded it, as she was living on her own while my father was drafted and serving in the army during World War II.  I have used is for years to help identify birds that I come across, though many of these species are now rare or extinct. I have always been entranced with his paintings of birds and vividly remember the pictures of scary vultures and condors that so impressed me as a child. https://kennethharperfinton.me/2015/04/26/john-james-audubon/

THE DOUBLE CRESTED-CORMORANT

The lake has attracted many species of ducks and geese since the City of Denver drained and remodeled it a few years back.  One bird friend has become quite close this spring. I did not know the name of the bird and dubbed it a long-neck goose. Shades of Chantilly Lace, I am sure. For weeks he stood guard over his next on top of a nearby tree. He seemed to be in his tree every time we walked the lake for many weeks.IMG_2199 I learned that the bird was a double-crested cormorant. Cormorants and Shags are medium to large seabirds that are found all over the world. Their ancestors were fresh water birds. Though their feet are webbed, they can perch high in trees. They are related to pelicans. Cormorants are diving birds that can dive to as much as 45 meters in search of fish and eels and water snakes. After their dives, they spread their wings to dry, as their feathers are not as waterproof as a duck of a goose. They have an ungainly hooked beak and have been at war with fishermen for centuries, as they compete for the fish in the area.

THE HOODED MERGANSER

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One of the more impressive and lesser known ducks is the secretive Hooded Merganser. “Hooded” is an understatement for this little duck, also called a Crested Merganser. Adult males are beautiful with sharp black-and-white patterns set off by chestnut flanks. Females have their own distinctive elegance drawn from their from their cinnamon crest.

In the winter, the birds nest in holes left in trees like squirrels, but they move to fresh water lakes in the spring and summer while they hatch their broods.

Hooded Mergansers are fairly common in Colorado on small ponds and rivers. They dive for fish, crayfish and other food, seizing it with their thin, serrated bills.

Though they nest in tree cavities, the ducklings leave the nest with a precocious leap to the forest floor when they are only one-day old. Hooded Mergansers are the smallest of the three Merganser species found in the United States.

Males and females of the Hooded Merganser live in monogamous pairs. They remain together until the female has selected a nesting place and completed the laying her clutch. After that, the male leaves the female to incubate and care for the brood. Females will actively seek out cavities in dead trees or artificial nest boxes such as those provided for wood ducks.They prefer cavities four to fifteen feet off the ground. Breeding occurs anytime between the end of February and the end of June, depending on the region.

The female will lay a clutch of seven to fifteen eggs but only begins incubation when the last egg has been laid. This insures synchronous hatching, so all the ducklings are consequently the same size. This evolutionary trait facilitates efficient parental care. During incubation, the female may lose anywhere from 8% to 16% of her body weight.

Like most waterfowl, Hooded Merganser hatchlings are precocial. They usually leave the nest within twenty-four hours after they hatch. Once they leave the nest, the young are immediately capable of diving and foraging, but they often remain with the female for warmth and protection The Mergansers are descended from a species of ancient ducks from the Late Pleistocene era. The exact relationship between the ancient birds and the modern species is unknown.

THE AMERICAN WHITE PELICAN

Since 1960, Colorado is also home to the American White Pelican, a huge, lovely bird with black feathers on the tip of their IMG_2167wings and a nine-foot wingspread.  They are also found at Berkeley Lake. If you have never seen a White Pelican, you will be amazed when you finally see one. They fly like gliders in formation and land with a precision that would make the Air Force proud.  Most of them die before leaving the nest, but if they survive that first year they can have a twenty year life span. They now breed in Colorado in the spring and summer and move to the southern coasts when winter comes.

THE MALLARDS

IMG_2139 Mallards are plentiful in local lakes. They are dabbling ducks that do not dive, but stand on their heads, butts in the air, to nibble on water plants, insects and roots.Version 2 The males have a glossy green head, a ring of white feathers on the neck and gray areas on the wings. They males are called Drakes. The females have brown-speckled plumage. They form pairs in the fall that lasts until the female lays the eggs in the spring. Then the male often leaves and forms bonds with other males and lets the female raise the brood until the molting season in June.

Mallards are gregarious birds that love to flock together in groups called ‘sords’. The male will forcibly mate with other females, especially if she has lost her mate. Male Mallards remain sexually potent most of the year. When they pair off with mating partners, often one or several drakes are left out. This lonely group of adolescent ducks sometimes targets an isolated female duck, even if she is of a different species, then they chase and peck at her until she weakens. At this point the males take turns copulating with the female.

On 5 June 1995 an adult male Mallard collided with the glass façade of the Natuurmuseum Rotterdam and died. Another drake Mallard raped the corpse almost continuously for seventy-five minutes. The author of a paper on this occurrence disturbed the scene and secured the dead duck. Dissection showed that the rape victim was of the male sex. It is concluded that the Mallards were engaged in an ‘Attempted Rape Flight’ that resulted in the first described case of homosexual necrophilia in the Mallard.

Mallards are the ancestors to most domestic ducks.

Version 2

YOU OLD COOT

Coots are plentiful at our lake. The American coot is also known as a mud hen. Though commonly thought to be ducks, American Coots belong to a distinct order called Rallidae. Coots do not have the webbed feet of ducks, but sport broad, lobed scales on their lower legs and toes that fold back with each step to facilitate walking on dry land. Groups of coots are called covers or rafts.

The oldest known coot lived to be 22 years old.

The American Coot is a migratory bird that occupies most of North America. It lives in the Pacific and southwestern United States and Mexico year-round and occupies more northeastern regions during the summer breeding season. In the winter they can be found as far south as Panama.

The Coot mating season occurs during May and June if they have enough territory. Coots are monogamous throughout their life. The American Coot typically has long courtship periods. This courtship period is characterized by billing, bowing, and nibbling. Billing is the touching of bills between the male and females. Males generally initiate the billing. As the pair bond becomes more evident, both males and females will initiate billing only with each other and not other males or females.

After a pair bond is decided, the mating pair looks for a territory to build a nest. A pair bond becomes permanent when a nesting territory is secured. First the male chases the female. Then, the female moves to the display platform and squats with her head under the water. The male then mounts the female, using his claws and wings to balance on the female’s back while the she brings her head above the water. Sex for the coot usually takes no longer than two seconds, thus the expression, “You old Coot.”

IMG_2149Coots generally build floating nests. The female lays 8–12 eggs per clutch. Females and males have similar appearances, but they can be distinguished during aggressive displays by the larger head plumage on the male. 

American Voots eat primarily algae and other aquatic plants but also animals (both vertebrates and invertebrates) when available.

The American Coot has a mixed reproductive strategy. The female practices a form of brood parasitism, a common alternative reproductive method in some birds. When a parasitic female lays her egg in a host female’s nest, the host female lays about two eggs per day. Host females may recognize parasitic eggs when the egg deposition pattern deviates from the traditional one egg per day pattern. The occurrence of brood parasitism may be influenced by the body size of the potential parasitic female relative to the potential host female. Parasitic females are generally larger than their host counterparts, but on average, there is no size difference between the parasite and the host.

The American Coot, unlike other parasitized species, has the ability to recognize and reject conspecific parasitic chicks from their brood. Parents aggressively reject parasite chicks by pecking them vigorously, drowning them or preventing them from entering the nest. They learn to recognize their own chicks by imprinting on cues from the first chick that hatches. The first-hatched chick is a reference to which parents discriminate between later-hatched chicks. Chicks that do not match the imprinted cues are then recognized as parasite chicks and are rejected. Hunters generally avoid killing American Coots because their meat is not as sought after as that of ducks.

Much research has been done on the breeding habits of American coots.

THE CANADIAN GEESE

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Non-migratory Canadian Goose populations are on the rise. They are a species that is frequently found on golf courses, in parking lots and urban parks. Owing to its adaptability to human-altered areas, it has become the most common waterfowl species in North America. In many areas Canadian Geese are now regarded as pests by humans. They pollute beaches and leave their staining feces in many an unwelcome place. An extended hunting season, deploying noise makers, and hazing by dogs have been used in an attempt to disrupt flocks.

The Canadian goose is a large, wild species with a black head and neck, white patches on the face. It has a brown body and beautiful markings. It was originally a native to the arctic and temperate regions of the far north, but through migration it has reached into northern Europe as well.  Like most geese, the Canadian goose is primarily herbivorous and normally migratory; it tends to be found on or close to fresh water.

These birds are extremely successful at living in areas that humans have altered greatly. Because Canadian geese have been able to establish breeding colonies in urban and cultivated areas, which provide food and few natural predators, they are well known as a common park species. Their success has led to them being considered a pests. Their destruction of crops, their constant honking noise, their copious droppings and aggressive territorial behavior – along with their and their nasty habit of begging for food –  has made them unwelcome in many areas.

Canada geese are also among the most commonly hunted waterfowl in North America.

By the early 20th century, over-hunting and loss of habitat in the late 19th century and early 20th century had resulted in a serious decline in the numbers of this bird in its native range. The giant Canadian Goose subspecies was believed to be extinct in the 1950s, In 1962, a small flock was discovered wintering in Rochester, Minnesota by Harold Hanson of the Illinois Natural History Survey.

During the second year of their lives, Canada geese find a mate. They are monogamous. Most couples stay together all of their lives. If one dies, the other may find a new mate. The female lays from two to nine eggs with an average of five per clutch. Both parents protect the nest while the eggs incubate, but the female spends more time at the nest than the male.

Two years ago, I knew little about ducks and geese. With camera in hand and a love of nature in my heart, I began to gain a new appreciation of the birds that populate our world. According to some estimates, there are about ten thousand different species of birds on Earth presently. Total populations for birds number about two to four hundred billion birds living today, excluding domestic chickens and turkeys.

This is much less than in past ages. We have lost about 500 species since 1500 and 129 known species have become extinct.  This is bad news for the planet, as birds help to pollinate crops and destroy pests. Scavenger birds clean uop the landscape and help with the decomposition of organic materials. Their decline even helps diseases to spread in human populations.

Estimates are that there are ten billion birds in the United States in the spring and twenty billion in the fall.

Winter and hunters kill about ten billion birds in the United States per year.

The American Bird Conservancy estimates that cats kill around two hundred million birds per year in the US alone.

PAINTED MERSANGER

HOW TO BUILD A WIND TURBINE

 

This video explains how a wind farm is built. It takes around 3 weeks to install a turbine. A wind turbine with 30 years working life will return its investment within 3 to 4 years after getting online.

ABSENCE MAKES THE MAN GET MADDER

A father is reprimanded for taking his kids out of school and makes the news with his reply:

“Dear Mr. and Mrs. Rossi,” the letter says, “I understand your family recently took a family vacation. I want you to be aware that the Abington School District does not recognize family trips as an excused absence, regardless of the activities involved in the trip. The school district is not in the position of overseeing family vacations or evaluating the educational nature of a family trip. The dates that your children were absent were recorded as unexcused. An accumulation of unexcused absences can result in a referral to our attendance officer and a subsequent notice of a violation of the compulsory school attendance law.”

MICHAEL ROSSI’S RESPONSE TO SCHOOL:

Dear Madam Principal,

While I appreciate your concern for our children’s education, I can promise you they learned as much in the five days we were in Boston as they would in an entire year in school.

Our children had a once-in-a-lifetime experience, one that can’t be duplicated in a classroom or read in a book.
In the 3 days of school they missed (which consisted of standardized testing that they could take any time) they learned about dedication, commitment, love, perseverance, overcoming adversity, civic pride, patriotism, American history culinary arts and physical education.

They watched their father overcome, injury, bad weather, the death of a loved one and many other obstacles to achieve an important personal goal.

They also experienced first-hand the love and support of thousands of others cheering on people with a common goal.

At the marathon, they watched blind runners, runners with prosthetic limbs and debilitating diseases and people running to raise money for great causes run in the most prestigious and historic marathon in the world.

They also paid tribute to the victims of a senseless act of terrorism and learned that no matter what evil may occur, terrorists can not deter the American spirit.

These are things they won’t ever truly learn in the classroom.

In addition our children walked the Freedom Trail, visited the site of the Boston Tea Party, the Boston Massacre and the graves of several signers of the Declaration of Independence.

These are things they WILL learn in school a year or more from now. So in actuality our children are ahead of the game.

They also visited an aquarium, sampled great cuisine and spent many hours of physical activity walking and swimming.

We appreciate the efforts of the wonderful teachers and staff and cherish the education they are receiving at Rydal Elementary School. We truly love our school.

But I wouldn’t hesitate to pull them out of school again for an experience like the one they had this past week.
Thank you for your time.

Sincerely,
Michael Rossi, Father

JOHN JAMES AUDUBON

Born AprilUnknown 26, 1785,  John James Audubon was birthed in what is now Haiti on his father’s sugar plantation. His birth name was Jean-Jaques, named after his father Jean who was a French privateer, commonly known as pirates. His father had the rank of Lieutenant in the French navy and his mother was a 27-year-old chambermaid from Les Touches, Brittany. His mother’s name was Jeanne Rabines and lived as a mistress with his father, Jean. She got a tropical disease and died on the island when her son was just a few months old.

Audubon grew up in France, but when he was 18 his father got him a false passport to escape the Napoleonic wars and the family moved to America. After the death of his mistress, his father had a number of children of mixed race with several native women. In 1789 his father sold part of his plantation in Saint-Domingue and purchased a 284-acre farm called Mill Grove, 20 miles from Philadelphia. African slaves greatly outnumbered the French colonists, so friends convinced Jean Audubon to return to France.

The children were raised in Couëron, near Nantes, France, by Audubon and his French wife Anne Moynet Audubon, whom he had married years before his time in Saint-Domingue. In 1794 they formally adopted both his natural children to regularize their legal status in France. They renamed the boy Jean-Jacques Fougère Audubon and the girl  Rose.

In France during the chaotic years of the French Revolution, Audubon grew up to be a handsome, gregarious man who played flute and violin, and learned to ride, fence and dance.

Audubon loved to walk and was a great walker. He loved roaming in the woods. He often returned home with birds’ eggs and nests and made crude drawings.

His father wanted his son to follow in his footsteps and tried to make a seaman of his son. When he was twelve, Audubon went to military school and became a cabin boy, but he found out that he was prone to seasickness and not fond of mathematics or navigation. After failing the officer’s qualification test, Audubon ended his fledgling naval career.

He was cheerfully back on solid ground and exploring the fields again, focusing on birds. He found some Phoebes nesting in a cave. As he had read that they returned to the same spot to nest every year, he wanted to test that idea. He sat in the cave with them and read a book for many days, until they were used to him and let him approach. Then he tied string to their legs to identify them. The next year,  he discovered that the same birds were back in the cave. It is the first known incident of banding birds.

Audubon fell in love with a woman named Lucy Bakewell. Her father objected to Audubon’s lack of career goals and insisted that he find a solid trade before marriage, so he opened a general store in Kentucky on the Ohio River. After that, John and Lucy were married.

During a visit to Philadelphia in 1812 following Congress’ declaration of war against Great Britain, Audubon became an American citizen and had to give up his French citizenship.

After his return to Kentucky, he found that rats had eaten his entire collection of more than 200 drawings. After weeks of depression, he finally took to the field again. He was determined to re-do his drawings to an even higher standard.

300px-NMSZBigAudubon was working in Missouri when the New Madrid earthquake struck in 1811. When Audubon reached his house, he was relieved to find no major damage, but the area was shaken by aftershocks for months.The quake is estimated to have been ranked from 8.4 to 8.8 on today’s Richter Scale of severity,. It was slightly stronger than the San Francisco earthquake of 1906.

Audubon wrote that while on horseback, he first believed the distant rumbling to be the sound of a tornado, “but the animal knew better than I what was forthcoming, and instead of going faster, so nearly stopped that I remarked he placed one foot after another on the ground with as much precaution as if walking on a smooth piece of ice. I thought he had suddenly foundered, and, speaking to him, was on point of dismounting and leading him, when he all of a sudden fell a-groaning piteously, hung his head, spread out his forelegs, as if to save himself from falling, and stood stock still, continuing to groan. I thought my horse was about to die, and would have sprung from his back had a minute more elapsed; but as that instant all the shrubs and trees began to move from their very roots, the ground rose and fell in successive furrows, like the ruffled water of a lake, and I became bewildered in my ideas, as I too plainly discovered, that all this awful commotion was the result of an earthquake. I had never witnessed anything of the kind before, although like every person, I knew earthquakes by description. But what is description compared to reality! Who can tell the sensations which I experienced when I found myself rocking, as it were, upon my horse, and with him moving to and fro like a child in a cradle, with the most imminent danger around me.”

He noted that as the earthquake retreated, “the air was filled with an extremely disagreeable sulphurous odor.”

The War of 1812 upset Audubon’s plans. He formed a partnership with Lucy’s brother and built up their trade in Henderson, Kentucky. Between 1812 and the Panic of 1819, times were good. Audubon bought land and slaves, founded a flour mill, and enjoyed his growing family.

After 1819, Audubon went bankrupt and was thrown into jail for debt. The little money he made was earned by drawing portraits, particularly death-bed sketches that were greatly in demand by country folk before photography.

He wrote, “[M]y heart was sorely heavy, for scarcely had I enough to keep my dear ones alive; and yet through these dark days I was being led to the development of the talents I loved.”

Audubon was a terrible business owner, and eventually he realized that his best chance for success lay in his birds after all.

170px-1_Wild_TurkeyLucy became the main breadwinner by teaching children in their home, while her husband traveled all over the continent collecting specimens for his masterpiece, Birds of America (1838).  The book was two feet wide and three feet tall, with 435 life-sized hand-colored plates of birds.

It was very expensive to print such a book, so the book was financed by advance orders as well as commissioned paintings, exhibitions, and any furs that Audubon was able to trap and sell on his excursions.

His book was a success. One reviewer wrote: “All anxieties and fears which overshadowed his work in its beginning had passed away. The prophecies of kind but over prudent friends, who did not understand his self-sustaining energy, had proved untrue; the malicious hope of his enemies, for even the gentle lover of nature has enemies, had been disappointed; he had secured a commanding place in the respect and gratitude of men.”

AN UNKNOWN SPECIES BRED WITH OUR ANCESTORS


Spread_and_evolution_of_Denisovans

MORE THAN 40,000 YEARS AGO a sub-species humanoid lived in Siberia. DNA analysis shows that they are a distinct species from the Neanderthal and modern human. Denisova Cave in SIberia housed extinct breeds of humanoids, including both of the above.

In late 2013 a new study was revealed to the Royal Society in London, In the examination of the DNA of a finger fragment found in the cave, they found that one section of the genome seemed to come from a previously unknown species. The same genetic results were confirmed in two teeth found on the site.

As yet, who preceded these extinct species is a great mystery.

How long have intelligent humanoids lived on Earth? It is a question that is less solved than we thought. Perhaps even a million years? More?

Turist_den-peschera


Tourists in front of the Denisova Cave, where “X woman” was found

Further reading:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Denisovan
http://www.nature.com/news/mystery-humans-spiced-up-ancients-sex-lives-1.14196
http://www.newscientist.com/article/dn24603-mystery-human-species-emerges-from-denisovan-genome.html#.VO9hLLPF_xL

MISSED OPPORTUNITIES

Ken Finton's avatarKenneth Harper Finton

MISSED OPPORTUNITY

MIssed Opportunies by Kenneth Harper Finton ©2014

“We often miss opportunity because it’s dressed in overalls and looks like work.” — Thomas A. Edison

OPPORTUNITY KNOCKS ONCE?

Does opportunity only knock once? Leon Spinks said it was so. He said that “opportunity knocks only once. You never know if you’ll get another opportunity.” Leon knows about knocking. He was the boxer that defeated Mohammad Ali in February of 1978 in a fifteen round decision fight.

Nonetheless, opportunity presents itself often. Opportunity is a set of circumstances that makes it possible to do something.  Hopefully, this action is a creative act, but it could just as easily be destructive.

Opportunities are time sensitive. We have all missed many opportunities. Sometimes they slide by unrecognized. Sometimes we are not ready for them. Sometimes we choose to ignore them.

Whatever your secret desires, there are always ways to make them ripen.

“MAKE IT…

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PUT ON YOUR OLD GRAY BONNET

ARCHIVAL RECORDING BY ARTHUR CLOUGH, 1909

Words by Stanley Murphy, Music by Percy Wenrich 1909

 

My grandfather used to sing this song back in the 1940s. It was old then as it was written in 1909. The words paint a world of stability where a couple married and spent their entire lives together a few miles from the very place they married and lived.

put_on_your_old_grey_bonnet

G                              A7

On the old farm house veranda sat old Silas and Miranda

D7               G

Thinking of the days gone by

A7

He said “Dearie, don’t be weary, you were always bright and cheery

D7                  G

but a tear dear dims your eyes”

D                  G         D                    G

She said “These are tears of gladness, they’re not tears of sadness,

A7                          D7

It was 50 years today that we were wed”

G                                      A7

And the old man’s eyes they brightened and his old stern heart it lightened

D7                G7

as he turned to her and said

[Chorus]

            C                         F

Put on your old grey bonnet, with the blue ribbon on it      

         C         D7            G7

and I’ll hitch old Dobbin to the shayhorsecarriageb

          C                         F

and we’ll ride to Dover through the fields of clover

       C      G7      C     (D7)

on our golden wedding day

G                              A7

It was in that same grey bonnet with the same blue ribbon on it

D7               G

in the same shay by his side

A7

that he drove her down to Dover through the same old fields of clover

D7         G

to be his happy bride

D                  G         D                    G

The birds were brightly singing, the old church bells were ringing

A7                          D7

as the passed by that old church where they were wed

G                                      A7

and at night while stars were gleaming the old couple lay there dreaming

D7                G7

dreaming of the words he said.

THE BIG ROCK CANDY MOUNTAIN

“The Big Rock Candy Mountain” was first recorded by Harry McClintock in 1928. Burl Ives recorded a popular version for children in 1949. It is a folk song about a tramp’s ideal home.

McClintock claimed to have written the song in 1895. His hobo name was  Haywire Mac. Some say the song was originally a song to lure children into the hobo way of life.

The words have changed over the years. An original verse is:

The punk rolled up his big blue eyes

And said to the jocker, “Sandy,

I’ve hiked and hiked and wandered too,

But I ain’t seen any candy.

I’ve hiked and hiked till my feet are sore

And I’ll be damned if I hike any more

To be buggered sore like a hobo’s whore

In the Big Rock Candy Mountains.

Big Rock Candy Mountain lyrics:

One evening as the sun went down and the jungle fire was burning

Down the track came a hobo hiking and he said boys I’m not turning

I’m headin for a land that’s far away beside the crystal fountains

So come with me we’ll go and see the Big Rock Candy Mountains

In the Big Rock Candy Mountains there’s a land that’s fair and bright

Where the handouts grow on bushes and you sleep out every night

Where the boxcars are all empty and the sun shines every day

On the birds and the bees and the cigarette trees

Where the lemonade springs where the bluebird sings

In the Big Rock Candy Mountains

In the Big Rock Candy Mountains all the cops have wooden legs

And the bulldogs all have rubber teeth and the hens lay soft boiled eggs

The farmer’s trees are full of fruit and the barns are full of hay

Oh, I’m bound to go where there ain’t no snow

Where the rain don’t fall and the wind don’t blow

In the Big Rock Candy Mountains

In the Big Rock Candy Mountains you never change your socks

And the little streams of alcohol come a-trickling down the rocks

The brakemen have to tip their hats and the railroad bulls are blind

There’s a lake of stew and of whiskey too

You can paddle all around ’em in a big canoe

In the Big Rock Candy Mountains

In the Big Rock Candy Mountains the jails are made of tin

And you can walk right out again as soon as you are in

There ain’t no short handled shovels, no axes saws or picks

I’m a goin to stay where you sleep all day

Where they hung the jerk that invented work

In the Big Rock Candy Mountains

I’ll see you all this coming fall in the Big Rock Candy Mountains.

WORLD’S HARDEST QUIZ

WORLD’S HARDEST QUIZ
Passing requires 4 correct answers

1) How long did the Hundred Years’ War last?
2) Which country makes Panama hats?
3) From which animal do we get catgut?
4) In which month do Russians celebrate the October Revolution?
5) What is a camel’s hair brush made of?
6) The Canary Islands in the Pacific are named after what animal?
7) What was King George VI’s first name?
8) What color is a purple finch?
9) Where are Chinese gooseberries from?
10) What is the color of the black box in a commercial airplane?

How much easier could this be?

ANSWERS TO THE QUIZ

Passing requires 4 correct answers
1) How long did the Hundred Years War last? 116 years
2) Which country makes Panama hats? Ecuador
3) From which animal do we get cat gut? Sheep and Horses
4) In which month do Russians celebrate the October Revolution? November
5) What is a camel’s hair brush made of? Squirrel fur
6) The Canary Islands in the Pacific are named after what animal? Dogs
7) What was King George VI’s first name? Albert
8) What color is a purple finch? Crimson
9) Where are Chinese gooseberries from? New Zealand
10) What is the color of the black box in a commercial airplane? Orange, of course.

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